Some Thoughts on Life & Living

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Last modified: Sunday, 14 August, 2016
 

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	Memorable quotes about men & women

1. Men get laid, but women get screwed.
   -- Quentin Crisp

2. When a man goes on a date he wonders if he is going to get lucky. A woman already knows.
   -- Federick Ryder

3. Women need a reason to have sex, men just need place.
   -- Billy Crystal

4. Do you know why God withheld the sense of humor from women? So that we may love you instead of laugh at you.
   -- Mrs. Patrick Campbell

5. There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men don't think there's a lot they don't know. Women do. Women want to learn. Men think, "I know what I'm doing, just show me somebody naked."
   -- Jerry Seinfeld

6. Women still remember the first kiss after men have forgotten the last.
   -- Remy de Gourmant

7. Only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. One is to let her think she is having her own way, and the other is to let her have it.
   -- Lyndon B. Johnson

8. Why get married and make one man miserable when I can stay single and make thousands miserable?
   -- Carrie Snow

9. "When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country."
   -- Elayne Boosler

10. "Behind every successful man is a surprised woman."
    -- Maryon Pearson

11. "Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then."
    -- Katharine Hepburn

12. "In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman."
    -- Margaret Thatcher

13. "I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house."
    -- Zsa Zsa Gabor

14. A man has to be Joe McCarthy to be called ruthless. All a woman has to do is put you on hold.
    -- Marlo Thomas, actress

15. Feminism - I myself have never known what feminism is. I only know that people call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat.
    -- Rebecca West, The Clarion, 1913

16. I'm just a person trapped inside a woman's body.
    -- Elaine Boosler, comedian

17. If the world were a logical place, men would ride sidesaddle.
    -- Rita Mae Brown, writer

18. Ginger Rogers did everything that Fred Astaire did. She just did it backwards and in high heels.
    -- Faith Whittlesey

19. I have yet not been able to answer ... the great question that has never been answered: What does a woman want ?
    -- Sigmund Freud

20. Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult.
    -- Charlotte Whitton, 1896-1975

21. I refuse to consign the whole male sex to the nursery. I insist on believing that some men are my equals.
    -- Brigid Brophy

22. All men are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher.
    -- Ambrose Bierce

23. The only man who never makes a mistake is the man who never does anything.
    -- Theodore Roosevelt

24. I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
    -- Rita Rudner

25. The male is a domestic animal who, if treated with firmness and kindness, can be trained to do most things.
    -- Jilly Cooper

26. In all systems of theology, the devil figures as a male person.
    -- Don Herold

27. Men are those creatures with two legs and eight hands.
    -- Jayne Mansfield

28. Men like to barbecue.  Men will cook if danger is involved.
    -- Rita Rudner

29. Men would like monogamy better if it sounded less like monotony.
    -- Rita Rudner

30. Man has his will - but woman has her way.
    -- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr

31. Men have become tools of their tools.
    -- Thoreau

32. Honey I never cry over a man.  I just yell "NEXT!!"
    -- Mae West

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